I Will Surely Break - Dean/Izzie/Sam - R
Oct. 14th, 2006 10:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
teffyI Will Surely Break
R
Grey's Anatomy/Supernatural AU
Dean/Izzie/Sam
Okay, so...I got attacked by a plot bunny on this one. I mean, there I was, on vacation and this idea kept popping up in my head. Izzie goes on a drive...no, Izzie essentially goes on a roadtrip to try to deal with some things, or run away from some things, and I can't think 'on the road' without thinking of Sam and Dean. After that, I have no idea where any of the rest of it came from. There's a disjointed style to this that I'm quite proud of because I think Izzie's thoughts after Denny's death were pretty much focused on that, meaning everything else was a bit muddled.
Also...take note of the AU up there. This is definitely an AU for both Grey's Anatomy and Supernatural. It starts at the same place the season premiere of Grey's started at and then takes off from there. As for the SPN timeline, I believe this fits in some time after the first couple episodes of this season.
Thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kashmir1 and mouseykins1 for the beta...and for helping me find my ending. *snuggles both of you*
The floor is cold against her cheek, against her bare shoulders where they're pressed against the tile.
She shivers and wishes he was underneath her.
*****
Some time during the day she dozes off, not meaning to, and she jolts awake a moment later wondering if it all has been just a dream.
*****
She wants them all to go away, forget about her, but she knows they won't.
Izzie gets up. She stands. She takes off the itchy dress.
It doesn't help much, but it's a start.
She finds the sweater on her bed and has no idea how it got there. She puts it on and breathes deep. It smells like antiseptic, sterile sheets, and plastic.
That's all she knows of his scent.
He always smelled like the hospital.
*****
It's been two weeks and everything is not so slow motion anymore.
Izzie just misses him. That's why she gets in the car and drives.
She drives east when all she really wants to do is go west and drive right into the ocean.
******
She stops counting the miles after the first couple hundred.
*****
It's barely morning when she pulls into the roadside motel. The vacancy sign blinks lazily and she thinks "No, shit" because there's only one other car parked outside the row of dingy doors.
There's someone leaning on it. Someone with coffee in both hands and a smile on his face when she shuffles by blearily on the way to her room.
It almost makes her stop.
*****
She sleeps until it's dark and the sound of muffled voices wake her up. She's pulling a sweatshirt on over her pajamas and opening the door before her eyes are even open all the way.
It's the car from earlier, the same guy too, only there's someone else with him now. Her only inmates in this lonely prison of a motel.
His head shoots up when he hears her and his expression is almost one of confusion.
"Sam? Sam, give me a hand with this." The trunk shuts and she flinches. Whoever he is, he shoves a bag into Sam's hands and she sees his sharp, green eyes before she turns away and lets the door close with a soft click behind her.
*****
Izzie lets the plastic bags from the local drug store fall to the pavement when she sees the blood.
The two she saw earlier, both of them, are slumped in the doorway to their room and the taller one, Sam, is struggling with the key. She can see the end of a deep gash peeking out from beneath the sleeve of his shirt. Both of their hands look red and raw.
"What happened?" She murmurs. It's the first time she's talked to anyone today and her voice sounds scratchy and rough.
"We're okay. Thanks, darling." Is the terse reply from the one who hasn't smiled at her yet.
"Dean...don't-" Sam winces and drops the keys.
"I'm a doctor." She doesn't know why she's saying it. "I can help."
They share a look and it's like they've just had an entire conversation that she couldn't hear.
"I can help." She repeats, but it's herself she's trying to convince, not them.
*****
Sam says 'thank you.' He says it three times before she's even started and she shakes her head when he tries to say it again as she begins the stitches along his arm. They've got one hell of a first aid kit.
"You're welcome." She says firmly.
Sam lowers his eyes and he watches her move quickly, closing up his deep wound. "Usually we take care of things like this ourselves." He says quietly and it sounds like he's apologizing.
"Yeah Sammy, but I don't know how good we'd be right now considering our hands are scraped to hell." Dean's low voice sounds just behind her and she looks up to find him peering over her shoulder curiously, watching her work. Or maybe he's just looking down her shirt.
"You're in my light." She says simply.
He finally smiles and for some reason she thinks of Denny.
It makes her both relieved and angry at the same time.
*****
She watches the pink tinged water swirl down the drain while she dries her hands on the corner of the towel that's not bloodstained.
It's only then that she sees the gun resting on the edge of the sink.
*****
She's at the diner across the street, sitting in a booth with a cup of coffee before she's finally stopped shaking.
It was just too much for her to process. Guns? Their battle ready first aid kit? Newspaper clippings along the wall? Who were these guys?
"There are things out there that don't stop. Even when it gets dark." Sam says, suddenly appearing there beside her. "In fact, most seem to prefer the dark." He adds wryly.
She looks up at him, his words tumbling around in her head. "What does that mean?"
He slides into the seat across from her and sighs. "It means that Dean and I try to keep people safe...from everything."
She burns her tongue when she takes a sip. "I don't believe you."
He doesn't act surprised.
*****
That night, she hears horrible noises and Sam puts lines of salt across her doorway and window ledges the next morning.
"Your grief is like a magnet." He tells her and she should have realized it was all her fault.
*****
Someone screams and she's pretty sure it's not her. Dean hauls her out the door of her room. "C'mon. It followed us back here. We gotta move."
She's practically thrown into the back of their car and when she scrambles to sit up she sees it out of the smudged back window.
"I believe you, Sam." She murmurs, voice nearly drowned out by the sound of squealing tires.
Dean sticks his arm out the door and fires a quick round back behind them.
The screaming stops but they keep driving anyway.
*****
They drive to a barn and she helps them burn something because she can't sit in the car and wait no matter how safe they promise her it is.
On the way back, she's nearly lulled to sleep by the sound of the engine.
Her clothes smell like sulfur. There are ashes in her hair. Sam and Dean let her fall onto one of the beds in their room.
They don't say anything when she cries herself to sleep.
*****
Light filters in through the warped mini-blinds painting the bed next to hers with jagged lines of white.
She watches Sam's mouth move against Dean's and wonders if they know how beautiful they are together.
*****
Izzie can't stop herself and Dean doesn't seem to want her to. She runs her hands down his back and tugs his hips closer. He's still wet from his shower and they fuck hard and fast on the bathroom floor.
Sam lets the door stay open, sprawled in the desk chair, watching them.
*****
She doesn't bother getting dressed again and she pulls on Dean's shirt to cover herself while she waits for them to tie up all the loose ends.
They look beat to hell when they finally get back, but they're smiling and Izzie knows they must have made sure it was gone.
Dean sprawls on the bed and she settles on his lap. It's Sam's hands that fist in her hair when she comes.
*****
Long fingers slide down her calf and she shifts against Dean's chest to glare down at Sam. The clock on the bedside table says that it is halfway to sunrise already.
"We can't ask you to come with us." His hair's a tangled mess and a bruise is beginning to form along his shoulder. She doesn't know if it's from her teeth or Dean's.
"I don't want to." She sighs, sliding her leg over his hip and scooting down the bed.
He thrusts into her and she whimpers. It's almost uncomfortable, but she rocks against him, back and forth, until he's gasping her name. Dean is there suddenly and she can feel the hard press of his cock against her back.
"Fuck. You two..." He growls.
Sam comes with a strained moan. Dean stills her hips with his hands and they both just watch him.
*****
In the end, they do ask her to come with them. Actually, it's Sam that does the asking while Dean presses desperate kisses to the back of her neck.
She wants to. Now, she wants to and it's not fair because they all know she can't.
*****
Driving straight through, all the way back to Seattle, she feels the gun against the small of her back, tucked into her jeans, and the ghost of Dean's fingers that had put it there.
"Better safe than sorry." He'd said and threw a bag of rock salt in her trunk.
Considering the circumstances it was one of the sweetest things anybody had ever done for her.
*****
She goes back to work and it's not the same, but it could be eventually. She takes to wandering around the hospital to help her keep her mind off things.
The pediatrics ward is comforting. The kids are happy and they laugh and hug her as long as she brings them candy and lets them win at Playstation.
Izzie is doing the best she can and Bailey tells her that's good enough. For now.
*****
She bakes muffins on Sundays. It helps her relax, a welcome routine, and the house smells good for the rest of the day. She limits herself to one batch, taking comfort in the fact that a baker's dozen is all she needs.
Sometimes, though, it's still hard to turn the oven off and put all the ingredients away.
*****
Six months later and she still knows the sound of the Impala's engine when it pulls up outside the house.
Six months later and Dean still smells like leather and Sam makes the same noise when she scratches her nails over the back of his neck.
Six months later and they are all not so broken anymore and this time, when they ask her, she might just say yes.
R
Grey's Anatomy/Supernatural AU
Dean/Izzie/Sam
Okay, so...I got attacked by a plot bunny on this one. I mean, there I was, on vacation and this idea kept popping up in my head. Izzie goes on a drive...no, Izzie essentially goes on a roadtrip to try to deal with some things, or run away from some things, and I can't think 'on the road' without thinking of Sam and Dean. After that, I have no idea where any of the rest of it came from. There's a disjointed style to this that I'm quite proud of because I think Izzie's thoughts after Denny's death were pretty much focused on that, meaning everything else was a bit muddled.
Also...take note of the AU up there. This is definitely an AU for both Grey's Anatomy and Supernatural. It starts at the same place the season premiere of Grey's started at and then takes off from there. As for the SPN timeline, I believe this fits in some time after the first couple episodes of this season.
Thanks to
kashmir1 and mouseykins1 for the beta...and for helping me find my ending. *snuggles both of you*The floor is cold against her cheek, against her bare shoulders where they're pressed against the tile.
She shivers and wishes he was underneath her.
*****
Some time during the day she dozes off, not meaning to, and she jolts awake a moment later wondering if it all has been just a dream.
*****
She wants them all to go away, forget about her, but she knows they won't.
Izzie gets up. She stands. She takes off the itchy dress.
It doesn't help much, but it's a start.
She finds the sweater on her bed and has no idea how it got there. She puts it on and breathes deep. It smells like antiseptic, sterile sheets, and plastic.
That's all she knows of his scent.
He always smelled like the hospital.
*****
It's been two weeks and everything is not so slow motion anymore.
Izzie just misses him. That's why she gets in the car and drives.
She drives east when all she really wants to do is go west and drive right into the ocean.
******
She stops counting the miles after the first couple hundred.
*****
It's barely morning when she pulls into the roadside motel. The vacancy sign blinks lazily and she thinks "No, shit" because there's only one other car parked outside the row of dingy doors.
There's someone leaning on it. Someone with coffee in both hands and a smile on his face when she shuffles by blearily on the way to her room.
It almost makes her stop.
*****
She sleeps until it's dark and the sound of muffled voices wake her up. She's pulling a sweatshirt on over her pajamas and opening the door before her eyes are even open all the way.
It's the car from earlier, the same guy too, only there's someone else with him now. Her only inmates in this lonely prison of a motel.
His head shoots up when he hears her and his expression is almost one of confusion.
"Sam? Sam, give me a hand with this." The trunk shuts and she flinches. Whoever he is, he shoves a bag into Sam's hands and she sees his sharp, green eyes before she turns away and lets the door close with a soft click behind her.
*****
Izzie lets the plastic bags from the local drug store fall to the pavement when she sees the blood.
The two she saw earlier, both of them, are slumped in the doorway to their room and the taller one, Sam, is struggling with the key. She can see the end of a deep gash peeking out from beneath the sleeve of his shirt. Both of their hands look red and raw.
"What happened?" She murmurs. It's the first time she's talked to anyone today and her voice sounds scratchy and rough.
"We're okay. Thanks, darling." Is the terse reply from the one who hasn't smiled at her yet.
"Dean...don't-" Sam winces and drops the keys.
"I'm a doctor." She doesn't know why she's saying it. "I can help."
They share a look and it's like they've just had an entire conversation that she couldn't hear.
"I can help." She repeats, but it's herself she's trying to convince, not them.
*****
Sam says 'thank you.' He says it three times before she's even started and she shakes her head when he tries to say it again as she begins the stitches along his arm. They've got one hell of a first aid kit.
"You're welcome." She says firmly.
Sam lowers his eyes and he watches her move quickly, closing up his deep wound. "Usually we take care of things like this ourselves." He says quietly and it sounds like he's apologizing.
"Yeah Sammy, but I don't know how good we'd be right now considering our hands are scraped to hell." Dean's low voice sounds just behind her and she looks up to find him peering over her shoulder curiously, watching her work. Or maybe he's just looking down her shirt.
"You're in my light." She says simply.
He finally smiles and for some reason she thinks of Denny.
It makes her both relieved and angry at the same time.
*****
She watches the pink tinged water swirl down the drain while she dries her hands on the corner of the towel that's not bloodstained.
It's only then that she sees the gun resting on the edge of the sink.
*****
She's at the diner across the street, sitting in a booth with a cup of coffee before she's finally stopped shaking.
It was just too much for her to process. Guns? Their battle ready first aid kit? Newspaper clippings along the wall? Who were these guys?
"There are things out there that don't stop. Even when it gets dark." Sam says, suddenly appearing there beside her. "In fact, most seem to prefer the dark." He adds wryly.
She looks up at him, his words tumbling around in her head. "What does that mean?"
He slides into the seat across from her and sighs. "It means that Dean and I try to keep people safe...from everything."
She burns her tongue when she takes a sip. "I don't believe you."
He doesn't act surprised.
*****
That night, she hears horrible noises and Sam puts lines of salt across her doorway and window ledges the next morning.
"Your grief is like a magnet." He tells her and she should have realized it was all her fault.
*****
Someone screams and she's pretty sure it's not her. Dean hauls her out the door of her room. "C'mon. It followed us back here. We gotta move."
She's practically thrown into the back of their car and when she scrambles to sit up she sees it out of the smudged back window.
"I believe you, Sam." She murmurs, voice nearly drowned out by the sound of squealing tires.
Dean sticks his arm out the door and fires a quick round back behind them.
The screaming stops but they keep driving anyway.
*****
They drive to a barn and she helps them burn something because she can't sit in the car and wait no matter how safe they promise her it is.
On the way back, she's nearly lulled to sleep by the sound of the engine.
Her clothes smell like sulfur. There are ashes in her hair. Sam and Dean let her fall onto one of the beds in their room.
They don't say anything when she cries herself to sleep.
*****
Light filters in through the warped mini-blinds painting the bed next to hers with jagged lines of white.
She watches Sam's mouth move against Dean's and wonders if they know how beautiful they are together.
*****
Izzie can't stop herself and Dean doesn't seem to want her to. She runs her hands down his back and tugs his hips closer. He's still wet from his shower and they fuck hard and fast on the bathroom floor.
Sam lets the door stay open, sprawled in the desk chair, watching them.
*****
She doesn't bother getting dressed again and she pulls on Dean's shirt to cover herself while she waits for them to tie up all the loose ends.
They look beat to hell when they finally get back, but they're smiling and Izzie knows they must have made sure it was gone.
Dean sprawls on the bed and she settles on his lap. It's Sam's hands that fist in her hair when she comes.
*****
Long fingers slide down her calf and she shifts against Dean's chest to glare down at Sam. The clock on the bedside table says that it is halfway to sunrise already.
"We can't ask you to come with us." His hair's a tangled mess and a bruise is beginning to form along his shoulder. She doesn't know if it's from her teeth or Dean's.
"I don't want to." She sighs, sliding her leg over his hip and scooting down the bed.
He thrusts into her and she whimpers. It's almost uncomfortable, but she rocks against him, back and forth, until he's gasping her name. Dean is there suddenly and she can feel the hard press of his cock against her back.
"Fuck. You two..." He growls.
Sam comes with a strained moan. Dean stills her hips with his hands and they both just watch him.
*****
In the end, they do ask her to come with them. Actually, it's Sam that does the asking while Dean presses desperate kisses to the back of her neck.
She wants to. Now, she wants to and it's not fair because they all know she can't.
*****
Driving straight through, all the way back to Seattle, she feels the gun against the small of her back, tucked into her jeans, and the ghost of Dean's fingers that had put it there.
"Better safe than sorry." He'd said and threw a bag of rock salt in her trunk.
Considering the circumstances it was one of the sweetest things anybody had ever done for her.
*****
She goes back to work and it's not the same, but it could be eventually. She takes to wandering around the hospital to help her keep her mind off things.
The pediatrics ward is comforting. The kids are happy and they laugh and hug her as long as she brings them candy and lets them win at Playstation.
Izzie is doing the best she can and Bailey tells her that's good enough. For now.
*****
She bakes muffins on Sundays. It helps her relax, a welcome routine, and the house smells good for the rest of the day. She limits herself to one batch, taking comfort in the fact that a baker's dozen is all she needs.
Sometimes, though, it's still hard to turn the oven off and put all the ingredients away.
*****
Six months later and she still knows the sound of the Impala's engine when it pulls up outside the house.
Six months later and Dean still smells like leather and Sam makes the same noise when she scratches her nails over the back of his neck.
Six months later and they are all not so broken anymore and this time, when they ask her, she might just say yes.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 05:26 am (UTC)DAMN.
This was just beautifully written and so well put together.
Dean sprawls on the bed and she settles on his lap. It's Sam's hands that fist in her hair when she comes.
AJSDKL;AJSKLDJA;
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:46 pm (UTC)Thank you so much. I'm real proud of this one.
Also, yes I agree with that keyboard smash. ;) These three are hot together.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 05:36 am (UTC)Light filters in through the warped mini-blinds painting the bed next to hers with jagged lines of white.
She watches Sam's mouth move against Dean's and wonders if they know how beautiful they are together.
GUH!!
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 06:55 am (UTC)I loved the way you brought Izzie together with Sam and Dean, and they were so hot. Great stuff!
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:49 pm (UTC)Thanks so much. I worked hard to make the three of them meeting believable. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 07:05 am (UTC)I love that line.
And the ending is perfect. They're so hot together. =D
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:50 pm (UTC):) Thanks so much.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 02:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 04:51 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading and enjoying!
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 05:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 05:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 09:10 pm (UTC)I love Izzie with them, being unsure but still...so very confident.
And MMM, smart girl, yes.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 09:39 pm (UTC)Thank you!
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 09:27 pm (UTC)BTW, I loved the line about Dean's resemblance to Denny..He finally smiles and for some reason she thinks of Denny. It was just too perfect. ;)
*hugs & smooches*
~C~
no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 09:28 pm (UTC)~C~
(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-10-14 11:14 pm (UTC)"I'm a doctor." She doesn't know why she's saying it. "I can help."
They share a look and it's like they've just had an entire conversation that she couldn't hear.
"I can help." She repeats, but it's herself she's trying to convince, not them.
Love this exchange.
She burns her tongue when she takes a sip.
Nice little detail. Especially considering she's going to accuse him of lying.
she feels the gun against the small of her back, tucked into her jeans, and the ghost of Dean's fingers that had put it there.
Ah...that's an excellent sensation to remember. Especially since it's Dean.
Much love for the disjointed style.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 03:52 pm (UTC)Also...for some reason the thought of Dean tucking a gun into the back of my jeans is INSANELY hot. I don't know why. And it's so sweet too.
Thanks for reading and enjoying. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 01:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 03:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 02:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 03:57 pm (UTC)I'm glad you enjoyed it.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 04:49 am (UTC)It's stark and painful and beautiful and hot and angsty and GUH.
*sighs happily*
no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 03:58 pm (UTC)*snuggles you*
no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 07:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 03:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 07:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 08:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 10:37 am (UTC)I'm not usually overly fond of crossovers but somehow Izzy Stevens and the Supernatural boys go together so nicely.
I particularly love the pace of this piece and how you manage to convey the extend of Izzy's grief. I also like the idea that there is a future for Izzy and the boys. ("happy ending" fiend that I am.) Obviously these three have the potential to become my favourite super hot because slightly fucked up OT3.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:14 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 11:01 am (UTC)He finally smiles and for some reason she thinks of Denny.
It makes her both relieved and angry at the same time.
*loves*
no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-15 04:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 01:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-16 04:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-20 10:41 am (UTC)I came here through [Unknown site tag]'s list of recs and I'm so happy I did.
I love the style, sketchy, essential, fragmentary. I love the way you gave us these characters, little glimpses, little blurs of soul and body that make so much sense.
So, so beautiful.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-22 05:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-02-19 12:00 am (UTC)Simply loved it, your writing style is so beautiful and the angst sort of breaks my heart. Liked the ending too, am glad you gave a bit of hope for happier times :)
no subject
Date: 2007-02-21 11:59 am (UTC)